Pre-Holiday Reflections

It is Tuesday afternoon and I am almost alone in the Conference Office. Someone is in the Business Office. I think Florence is working in the Community Service Department. Oh yeah, the Books Store is open for another half hour. But that’s it! So I am blogging since I have not been at it for a few days.

Penny is in town, but she’s out exploring the shopping establishments in the Scottsdale area. That’s a lot of shopping establishments! But she seems to be enjoying the experience. I have been sensing my wallet heating up spontaneously; perhaps due to its close relationship to a paternal twin credit card Penny has in her possession. I fear for my financial future, although the economy is being stimulated directly by my wife’s holiday economic endeavors.

I will be headed back to California tomorrow, or Thursday at the latest, to spend Christmas and New Year’s Day with the family. I look back and realize I have been here half a year already. That is unbelievable! I will spend some moments during my week off in serious reflection. I wonder what, if any, difference I am making. I wonder is the system can be saved. I wonder if the necessary chaged can be evoked with the present leadership in place. I wonder if it worth rescuing as it presently exists. I wonder if God brought me here. I wonder if He can make something extraordinary happen with such an ordinary person leading the charge.

The funny thing is that I know the answer to all these questions in the part of my heart that resonates with faith and hope. But the part of me that sees things from a different perspective cannot help but wonder how God is going to accomplish what He chooses to accomplish. I can’t help but wonder if God and I are on the same page. Yet at the same time, I do not see myself doing anything else! The Kingdom of God belongs to the little ones. Someone has to take the hits for those who don’t know any better.

This last week I shared glimpses of my life with my co-workers during our morning staff devotional time. I was in charge last week. My basic premise was that we can’t choose most of our lives’ experiences—where, when, to whom, why, or the circumstances surrounding our birth. It only gets worse after that. We are who we are due in large part to events over which we had little say. But, more powerful than the “we are” life commandments, are the “you are” declarations about us from God, through Christ. He makes declarations about who we are, not in spite but, because of who we are! His “you are” statements trump the “we are” life commandments we pick up along the way. The difference is made by the “I Am” statements of Jesus. His “you are” statements negate the “we are” statements because of His “I AM” statements. Was that simple enough? I guess you had to be there.

Which is exactly the point—here I am. Because of who I am as a result of my life, I am here to become what God has envisioned for me in His gracious heart. Wherever I am—I am!